The year gets worse for Aviation - Yemenia Air Crash

It seems anunas horriblus is getting more horribuls this year with the loss of another aircraft - this time a Yemenia Air Airbus A310 from on route IY626 Sanaa to Moroni in the Comoros islands.



Picture (c) Baron Inchcap, - http://www.flightglobal.com/airspace/photos/baron_inchcape1/airbus-a310-f-ohpr-yemenia-3198.aspx


It seems the aircraft made one attempt at landing before contact was lost with the aircraft, and from the reports, it seems there conditions were described as "challenging" with high winds.

Prehaps more worryingly, this particular A310 wasn't excatly praised in it's last inspection whilst in France, and hasn't been back since.

From the reports - 1 child has survived. The rest of the 141 passengers and 11 crew (152 souls) are alas being accounted for in bodies.

This year is just not good.

May the souls rest in peace.

Project 787.. Oh dear... (or Seattle: We have a problem)

Note: I was going to publish this last week but I got distracted by a few other things. A few more updates will appear tonight including my personal 787's (Yes - I have an armarda of them). Sorry!

Well Seattle. We have a little problem. What was going to be a glorious first flight has resulted in yet another delay for the 787 ZA001's first flight.


Exhibit 1: Ok . Not a real Dreamliner. I lied a bit.



So what's happened this time?

In very basic terms, an issue with the centre wingbox and wingsbox seem to at the crux of the matter - requiring enforcement. At the moment, it could be considered safe to fly - but with no meaningful results so once again, the poor bird is sitting on the ground awaiting more work.



For the unitated... the wing box.... oh its where the wing joins the body. As in this badly PS'd picture.

Jon at FlightBlogger has a very nice techinical explanation:

• http://www.flightglobal.com/blogs/flightblogger/2009/06/breaking-boeing-postpones-787.html
• http://www.flightglobal.com/blogs/flightblogger/2009/06/a-closer-look-understanding-th.html
  

The fallout from this could be pretty big.

• ANA is seeking further clarification (least of all as the launch carrier)
  
• Qatar has already made its thoughts clear regarding the 787 programme (sort it or we'll pull our orders).
  
• Qantas has dropped 15 of its current orders citing the current downturn for it's Jetstar unit (whilst retaining the options it has for later - so instead of 787-8's they are heading straight to 787-9's)
• Lufthansa is pretty much resigned to a delay in the 747-8 passenger version
• Already there is a lot of companies who don't want to touch the first 20 787-8's due to the weight issues (in simple terms these aircraft are over-heavy in desgin - which reduce the range an aircraft can fly.)
  
• And I'd wager there's more to come as companies look for easy get outs during this downturn, some more 787 cancellations or "deferals" will occur
  

Whilst the 787 will probably go on to be a great aircraft, it's having a troublesome and difficult birth to the skies.

Those Kiwis are at it again...

Well, someone had to try and take Deltalina's crown.

And ladies and gentlemen - we have a winner!

Earlier on, I blogged about one of Air New Zealand's adverts - well it seems they've decided it was a bit successful... and have made a safety video!



All I'm going to say is Well done!!! Excellent work all around. Beat that Deltalina!

Mileage Run Designing - for my next trick...

At the moment, I'm beginning planning for my October trip to the USA (There's a little event going in Chicago I'm invited to do the photos in... so it's rude to say no).

As I still need a fair wodge of miles to hit gold (wodge in this case being about 14k or so), I have to be slightly careful in how to plan this out.

Here was the initial plan



Breakdown:

LHR-ORD London Heathrow — Chicago O'Hare	3942
ORD-LAS Chicago O'Hare — Las Vegas - Mccaran International Airport	1514
LAS-SFO Las Vegas - Mccaran International Airport — San Francisco	600 (414)
SFO-LHR San Francisco — London Heathrow	5367
Trip Total	11423 (11237)

Hmm. Good - but we can do better than that!

An interesting wrinkle in this is the use of 600 mile minimums for flights under that distance. And of course, there are such things as married pairs...

So lets look at this again -what are the breakdown points between all of these points?

LHR-ORD can be split as LHR-IAD-ORD (3942 vs 4277)
ORD-LAS can be split as ORD-LAX-LAS or ORD-SFO-LAS (1546 vs 2245 vs 2446)
LAS-SFO ... it's not worth splitting alas verses the additional cost. (600)
SFO-LHR can be split as SFO-SAN-LHR (5637 vs 6085)




So with a bit of table magic...

LHR-IAD London Heathrow — Washington Dulles	3677
IAD-ORD Washington Dulles — Chicago O'Hare	600 (589)
ORD-LAX or ORD-SFO Chicago O'Hare — Los Angeles Chicago O'Hare — San Francisco	1745 (LAX) 1846 (SFO)
LAX-LAS or SFO-LAS Los Angeles — Las Vegas - Mccaran International Airport San Francisco — Las Vegas - Mccaran International Airport	600 (236)
LAS-SFO Las Vegas - Mccaran International Airport — San Francisco	600 (414)
SFO-SAN San Francisco — San Diego Airport/td>	600 (447)
SAN-LHR San Diego Airport — London Heathrow	5485
Trip Total	13307 (12593) via LAX 13408 (12872) via SFO

Using LAX



Using SFO



Considering instead of being nearly 2500 mile short, I'd now be 250 miles short of Gold... well the numbers really show off what a bit of planning can do. I'm trying to put an extra segment in... but how this hits the costs...

Notes: All numbers approximate to within 20 miles.
Image credits: Great Circle Mapper - http://gc.kls2.com, Calculation tool MileCalc.com

Meanwhile.. in LOLworld.

Please pay attention to this bunny for your safety briefing. Your safety is our number one concern.

Thank you.




Source: http://icanhascheezburger.com/2009/06/23/funny-pictures-exits-on-this-plane/

Tuesday SoapBox. Daily Mail - GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT!!!!

Yes, I know. The Soapbox is a bit late this week - so it's a double entry today.

And today's soapbox entry is about an entry from "Back to Basics Britain, "Middle England," "Angry from Tonebridge" and "conservative with a small c - honest " the Daily Mail (also known as the Daily Hate)

Here's the article that sparked my ire...


URL: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1194937/Terrified-tourists-boycott-flight-home-told-sit-balance-nose-heavy-jet.html

So lets go for the shock horror panic of a badly researched story (what the Daily Mail doing bad research... never. Oh wait. Of course. It's the Daily Mail!)

Lets work through the choice quotes of this report

"Passengers had been asked to act as human ballast because a jammed door had prevented the rear hold from being used so all the luggage was in the forward hold, making the jet nose-heavy."

Ok. So there was no engineering support to get the other door open. Luggage was loaded on the from hold. Big whoop. Shift the passengers around for load purposes - not uncommon.

"British tourists feared the plane was not fit to fly them home and refused to board at the airport in Mallorca."

Well that explains a lot. They're British! They deserve better service and not being shoved around the plane!

"Some of those due to depart said that holidaymakers who had just landed in the jet warned them not to board it, saying they had just had the worst flight they had ever experienced."

Hmm. So no news on how weather was, what turbulence there could had been or what actions the pilot and crew took? One sided reporting there possibly?

"A total of 71 people refused to get on the plane at the airport five miles outside Mallorcan capital Palma and instead paid hundreds of pounds for flights with other airlines"

Ladies and Gentlemen.. and chavs - may I refer you to your conditions of carriage that state what can happen. This was within in.

"Rowen's mother Hazel said: 'It was like they were being asked to fly in something that was being balanced out like a seesaw."

Well this happens when they're loading a plane with cargo and luggage. You need to balance and keep things in trim. A seesaw is probably a better analogy than some. Of course, I haven't mentioned that a centre of gravity is important.

Now a rebuttal.

"Thomas Cook today said the seating move was routine and posed no safety risk.

A spokeswoman said: 'It is standard for all airlines to ensure cargo and passengers are evenly distributed on an aircraft and there will be times when passengers will be asked to move to the front or back of a plane.

'We are disappointed that despite reassurances from the captain and crew, a number of passengers decided not to travel.'"

So basicly what is Standard Operating Procedure has been turned into a farce by the Daily Mail.

Wait - hasn't this happened before - Ah Yes. When XL had a few issues and posted a picture of a 767 when it was a 737 that had a problem.

You know a little research never hurts. Like this article at wiki about http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weight_and_balance

The BBC has gone slightly less sensational, and presents the facts...

See: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tyne/8115216.stm

NOW THE DAILY MAIL - YOU'LL TOO LAZY TO READ THIS BUT REPORT THE FACTS AND NOT THE FICTION. LEARN ABOUT A COMPANY BEFORE REPORTING IT.

Virgin buys more Twin-Engined Jets - Throws out quadrapuff strategy....

Something that happened yesterday.. Virgin Atlantic became 25 years old... but more importantly for the geeks amongst us, Virgin made an order for more aircraft - this time more Airbus A330's.

Hang on. This from the airline that said "4 engines 4 longhaul".

They're also on the warpath for Boeing 787-9's and Airbus 350's.

Now there is a sign that someone has visited the Strategy Boutique and picked up a new one in a rush. The realist says they're replacing some of the older 747 capacity and probably some of their older A340-300's. The actualist realises that these older aircraft burn fuel like it's out of business and this is a chance to get some new aircraft on the cheap and try and make cheap publicity out of it.

From what they're mumbling about IFE, it's looking quite a nice product throughout the plane, but there seems to be telecoms capability that's being built into the specification to allow text messages and emails to be sent from devices, and USB/Power from the Upper Class/PE seats.

Perhaps Branson inc should stop toying with peoples jobs (as is their habit at the moment when mentioning the long term enemy) and start concentrating on his own companies and getting their houses in order.


Or - I think Richard has spent far too much time with Kate Moss....


Image (c) Getty/Metro/Assiocated Press Ltd -
Source. http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?Branson_manhandles_Kate_Moss&in_article_id=689820&in_page_id=34


The other issue that is now coming to the fore, and perhaps more important is the 787... and the distinct lack of deliveries (and even the wait for first flight). And it's now starting to bite with companies shopping around for stopgap aircraft and even certain Qatar airlines saying they're close to pulling out of Project Dreamliner...

Come in BMI.. your time is up!

Well for us BMI Diamond Club members, the end is finally nearing in the Love-Hate forced takeover of BMI by Lufthansa.

Like any couple heading up the isle, there has been squabbles, backtracking, leagel fights.. leaving the children (in this case, BMI staff and BMI flyers) waiting for the outcome.

But today, it seems "LHBD Holding Limited" exists as a holding company in the UK to start shoring up the shares of Sir Michael Bishop (50%+1) and the existing Lufthansa share (30%-1).

From the looks for it, there has been fiscal fishing and fixings - but it's all heading to an endgame now.

Additionally, the 20% from SAS needs to be got hold of, but as of today - BMI is basically part of the Lufthansa group.

Better start spending your hard earned BD miles.

For the staff involved - Good luck!

Airplane p0rn - Alaska Airlines 737 Salmon-Thirty-Salmon

As if I've forgotten - Time for some airplane p0rn.

This week - it's the turn of Alaska Airlines and it's painted-up 737...



Behold - the Salmon-Thirty-Salmon!

Paris Air Show Day 5: Pretty Graphs at last!

Now that I'm sitting at my desk and for once not cursing CA and their "wonderful" AV products, it's time to get down to the nitty gritty of Paris 2009 - or "The year when 10 Wide Body jet is considered a big order"

New orders on day 5 -
Olympic Airways join the Dash-8 400 party with an order for 5, option for another 5

So lets put this into graphics.



So what are the scores in terms of class? I've split these into 4 categories: Widebody (twin isle jets), NarrowBody (>100 people single isle jets), Regional - Turbofan powered and Regional - Turboprop powered



Sources: Flight, BBC News, Airbus/EADS, Boeing. Graphs show only complete orders - not options or MOU's. So there.

Perhaps the big winners this year are narrow-bodies, and the regional turbofans. In particular, the A320 design seems to be grabbing new share in terms upgrades. The Wizz-Air MOU for 50 A320's is very good news - and will keep a lot of people in jobs hopefully when its signed and converted into a full order.

The Superjet is doing quite well, but to break through to new markets - it needs to find a big "western" operator (for lack of a better geopolitical term) to make it really sell. Again, I'd want to see the performance the jet and how it fits into the new markets well enough. Equally doing well is Bombardier with their CRJs.

We knew it wasn't going to be a long haul year - so we'll drink a mug of coffee to an A350XWB orders by Air Asia X and Vietnam Airways - a sign that they're looking towars the upturn.

In real terms, Boeing has kept very quiet in terms of commerical jets apart three bits of noise -

• The proposed "777-300ER-Plus" which could be a re-winged jet (Boeing - hint - Airbus tried that with the A350 initially), A 787-10 (Much more likey as it could be a simple/slightly complex stretch) or a clean sheet design (is there enough slush money to design a clean sheet aircraft I wonder?)
• The first 787-8 is nearing clearance for first take off at the end of this month
  
• And Qatar airlines getting very narked off with the delays to 787 project and telling Boeing in so many words "Sort it or we'll cancel" (and probably saying it for a lot of other 787 recpieants)

This year we all predicted quiet. But there has been noise thankfully - even on the IFE front and more airlines taking on Panasonic's X Series IFE system, Wireless IFE and a few other neat technologies. In this time of squeeze, some new ideas are sneeking out.

Back to normal next week with irreverent chatter.

Paris Air Show Day 4: More Narrow body twins vicar? - CO61 Incident

And Welcome to Day 4

New Orders:
- China Eastern plump for 20 A320's
- Afrijet's order for four ATR 72-500s
- Aigle Azur - 1 A319
- Zest Airways Inc (ZestAir) of the Philippines - 1 A320
- Possible big order from WizzAir of 50 A320's.
- MC Aviation Partners (lessor) has ordered 2 737-800's

Alas, more important things are happening in the air today - with the death of a Continental captain whilst in the cockpit. Whilst the reserve pilot was able to take the spare seat, there was no other incident involved.

From the looks of things, no information (other than a doctors request) was made during flight so there was surprise.

Good work to the 3rd pilot for taking the left hand chair, our thanks to the doctor for trying to help, and my condolences to the family

Paris Air Show Update Day 3

Sorry - no fancy graphic today as it's been a day from hell (and when I find the ****** who wrote the Conflicker virus, I will rip them to bits - then leave them to the rest of the office)

Order update
Royal Air Maroc - 6 ATR's of sorts.

IFE Update - Panasonic have been mentioning that their iPod merging equipment is going nicely... on the following airlines: Singapore, United, Avianca, Air New Zealand, Swiss

Lets break this down
United - Enabled on the new C class (767 and 747's that are refurbished)
Air New Zealand - 13 Airbus A320s and five Boeing 767s
Singapore - A330-300's - All classes, A340-500 (C only)
Avianca - A330-200's
Swiss- ? (New/Refurnished A330's probably)

And another new customer. Well as ANA is getting a 787 soon, its pretty safe to say that the Panasonic X series IFE is preinstalled in it as the default IFE system. But there's also another customer that Panasonic is keeping stum about.

More tomorrow.

News: Meanwhile...

Airline updates:

British Airways

Oh BA. Dearie me :(

There's not much else to say other than good luck to those involved. Alas, a smaller BA might emerge after this dip and bust is done and dusted. All we can hope is that the minimum of jobs are hit - because no matter what goes on - in each one of those companies... there are people still.

Singapore Airlines (Engineering)

Also join this list of the unpaid or "take some unpaid leave". Times are defiantly bad out there

Ryanair

The airline that seems to make money from anything other than flying has decided not to run it's website 24/7 owing to "urgent system upgrades"

Right after they switch over to a Check in online only policy.

CLEVER!

With the most cleverest bit of advice -"they must do their web check-in before 6pm Wednesday the 24th."

SUPER CLEVER BUNCH OF...

Y'know, I sometimes worry about the industry. Then there's Ryanair.

And the worst part - I'm afraid that someone else will copy them.

Paris Air Show Day 2: More Orders... and what about IFE

Welcome to yet another review of day to at Paris

... and if we're blunt, not a lot from those IFE units and suppliers today. However Thales (who are providing the IFE on the new QR birds) seem to have a new weez... Wireless IFE

Of course, wireless seems to be one of those buzzwords, so we're looking at wireless in terms of Cabin control and systems. Of course - pumping all those bits and bytes across a LAN the size of an aircraft requires cabling.

Neither Thales and Panasonic seem to be new to this as Boeing spec'd it into the 787 - which of course was popped out when Boeing ran into a few little issues.

Here's a hint: there's work to be done - least of all bandwidth control. Don't expect it in your next plane for some time...


However today's tidbits include a few more orders - one from Air Asia X for 10 A350's (option of 5), 16 A321's for Vietnam Airlines, with a pair of A350's, 5 for Cebu Pacific but more interestingly, up to 20 (10 confirmed, 10 option) ATR-72-600 from Air Nordstrom (who were doing a lot of buying yesterday with their acquisition of CRJ-1000's)



Obviously someone hasn't told Air Nordstrom there's a downturn on at the moment - but as they run CRJ-200's, ATR's probably could be considered an upgrade probably.

On the Boeing front (who are strangely quiet - probably all the fun with the 787 due for take off at the end of the month), there seems to discussions regarding either re-winging the 777, moving towards 787-10 or even a clean-sheet design.

There's logic on all fronts - 777 re-winged means the use of a perfectly good body with fancy new wings, 787-10 (an easy follow-on) or Clean-Sheet (which will give spotters something to wet themselves over) - so it's down to what is the commercial consideration of working towards these new models - and how does Airbus's A350-800/900/1000 fit into the picture?

Interesting times as always...

Paris airshow and IFE - What's hot?

Well this week the Paris Air Show is off and running.

Obviously, I'm not there (my purse strings are limited y'know), so I'll be analysing some of the stuff coming from Flight International, Cranky, and a few other sources to make some sort of sense of whats going on in the world on In-Flight Entertainment

Lets look at the free entertainment first - the world out of your window.

PPG seem to be developing it's controllable electrochromic systems. Now in English, that's simply dimming the windows by remote systems as opposed to pulling down a blind. Sounds famliar? Yes - it's the same technology as will be appearing on the 787 (which might fly this month!) and also in ickle private jets.

Source: http://www.flightglobal.com/articles/2009/06/15/327865/paris-air-show-ppg-shows-off-the-future-for-cabin-windows.html

A nice technolgy from blinding people (and defiantly fun to control the light), but how will this feel in the air? I'm not sure. Oh well. Like the world needs simple blinds as it is....

Meanwhile, people seem to have some money and dread the thought - going out and BUYING aircraft. Seems as some people are preping for the upturn already.

So lets do graphics:

Notes:
QR - 20 A320, 4 A321
Malev -30 Sukhoi Superjet
Air Nordstrum - CRJ-1000's


Update #2
Well well well! It looks like these QR A320's are having IFE installed! According to the documentation, it's by Thales, and it appears from the mockups appear to be a touchscreen interface. For a short to midrange aircraft - very impressive setup.


(c) Thales.

Now this is impressive for a midhaul operation. Something QR's competitors definatly to take note of. The seats should be retro-fittable into any A320 class aircraft, so if its a matter of wiring and cost - with possible inseat txt and emailing capabilities - then there's a winner here for all...

More updates later on...

Sunday Soapbox - Food.. Make an effort please!

Now moving to a subject close to my heart - Food.

I don't expect the finest gourmet dining whilst in the air. Heck, in economy, I expect to be give something resembling food and be done with it.

What I don't expect is this:



Ok, I'll vaguely attempt to ignore the bad attempt at Salad (hey, chuck some green leaves together), the abomination of Pudding (A triple chocolate brownie - FFS they were being given away by the handful in a Red Carpet Club)

I'm going to focus on that ... thing in the centre. The "So called Chicken Curry"

Lets zoom in.



How is it possible to mess up a curry? Let United Airlines tell thee:

• Carrots - stab them and they'd fall appart
• Beans - in which curry recipe? Again - fallapart
• Have you spotted the chicken yet? I think I counted 3 peices
• Rice - Complety burnt and soggy.

Developing food menus is down to cost and how they wish to manage that cost. However, food like this is quite frankly abominal. Whilst the food element I reckon was no more that £1 (or $2 if I'm generous), it's still a portion of the air ticket I paid for.

COME ON. IMPROVE THE FOOD PLEASE!

Airplane p0rn - Concorde Tailfin

It's Friday, so obviously it's time for some Airplane p0rn.

Today - it's from Seattle at the Museum of Flight and the tail-fin of a Concorde (G-BOAG for those who collect letters).

And yes - that is one of the first 737's in the background - the NASA one.



More Airplane p0rn next week!

Cashback on Flying!

We all hate ponying up cash for things in life. But what if we could money from a click?

We all know about referrals from site to site - generating revenue for the adveriser. Well cashback sites give you that cash...back (hence the name - cashback... rather simples really)

Here's a quick look in terms of AIRLINES in what you could get from companies if going through a site like QuidCo, GreasyPalm, rPoints, TopCashback, CashbackKings, etc*

* I've only included 3 I've had time to research today.

Site	QuidCo	Top Cashback	Cashback Kings
Air France	1.20%	Up to 2%	Up to 2%
Air New Zealand	1%	1.5% - 2.25%	-
BMI	4.50%	-	2.50%
Cathy Pacific	1.30%	1.30%	1.50%
Eithad	£12	£12	-
Emirates	1.50%	1.25%	1.25%
Flybe	1%	-	1%
KLM	£9	Up to £5	Up to £5
Lufthansa	2%	2%	-
Qantas	2%	2%	-
Qatar	1%	1%	-
SAS	2%	1%	-
Singapore	1%	1%	-
SWISS	£5.50	£5.00 to £5.50	£5.00
Virgin Atlantic	2%	1.5% to 2.5%	1%

Things to remember:

• You don't get cashback instantly in most cases!
  
• Some sites may collect a fee from your first transactions or may charge a yearly fee.... or may even charge you for joining
• Some sites may take a cut of your cashback
• Sometimes if the transaction doesn't track, you'll have to chase after it
• And sometimes - it won't be approved!
  
  

Yes - it's a right old minefield - but if used correctly, it'll save a few pennies on the next filight or two. And lots of pennies make a happy bank manager. Or a bailout fund. Whichever is more in keeping of the moment

Notes - provided links are NON Referring - i.e. I don't make a bean from you clicking. Also that this data was seen on 11/06 and probably has changed pretty soon after then.

IFE.. of sorts - Pete Doherty found with needles... and Heroin

Pete Doherty. The man who quiet frankly who can't turn a tune or goes out with the Beehive of 2008 seems to be once again in trouble

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20090608/en_afp/switzerlandbritainpeopledoherty

Nothing in there about the possible dangers to other passengers, or the fact Heroin possession is a Class A drug, with up to 7 years in the slammer.

And all he got was a smegging fine.

I give up....

Trip Report - Saying Goodbye to a friend - LHR-PHL with United

Saying Goodbye to a friend - Travelling for the wrong reasons.
A United Experience - LHR-ORD-PHL-IAD-LHR

For DW - Have fun up there!
--
Previously...

LHR-BRU-LHR... or "How do you burn a £50 BMI voucher without too much pain?"
MAN-ORD (29/10 ... or Did Kevin Make it to ORDChicago, IL - O'Hare?)
Kevin goes for a little mileage run on UA - ORD/CMH/IAD/EWR/ORD
ORD-MAN in BMI Premium Economy (with Pictures)
Kevin’s American Adventure – MAN-ORD-SEA-ORD-MAN (4 flights, 2 weeks) in Y..
ORD-MAN in BMI Premium Economy: How hard can a PE product drop? (also random moans)
LHR-PHL-SEA, SEA-PHX-ORD, ORD-PHL-LHR- In Y, Come and be scared with US!
LHR-SFO-LHR - If you're going to San Francisco - SFO MegaDO Trip report
Gold Run - Mr Kevincm goes to Washington with EI and US
Long Haul Commuter Run - LHR-IAD-ORD and back with UA

--
What's a matter dear reader? You've forgotten how I write my trip reports? Well I'm going to be cruel this time - no rambling intro on how they are written, the bad humour, and random things in them.

Heck. I just mentioned it. Oh clams - Well the usual rules in effect .

As usual, the bulk of the photos can be found at http://kevincm.photoblog.com and this trip will be simulacast (ooh new word) at http://www.gettoife.com (my blog)

On a more serious note - you've probably guessed by now that there's slightly different tone in this report...

---

Introduction

Most of my travels - lets face it - have been for fun or business. Unfortunately, a series of events has lead me to travel for the first time for reasons I didn't want to travel. One of my friends passed from this world to the next, and as a result, I was asked to accompany another friend to the USA to help out and provide support to them.

Naturally of course - I agreed.

However to get there - I would have to go to the nemesis of an airport I have come to dislike - Philadelphia International Airport!

Why do I have a passionate dislike of Philadelphia? Primarily it seems one has to hike a mile from one gate to another... and the INS people REALLY don't like me when I pass through there (an hour and 15 minutes to get through immigration isn't my exact idea of "fun").

But needs must... and travel must be done.

Booking

Of course, as a Star Alliance flyer it boils down to two choices at such short notice - UA or US. The term I’m looking for here is... "A rock and a hard place".

For US - To be honest, there was one attractive thing about PHL- the Envoy lounge. The rest of the US Airways experience is... umm... I've documented that enough I think
For UA - E+ Seating, IFE, and some okiesh lounges at ORD, IAD and PHL.

Well that's a hard choice!

There was also the small matter of mileage for my friend (who needs a few thousand or so to get to *S, and I need every single mile I can lay my mutts on to retain Gold), so getting a few extra segments in isn't a bad thing.

As this was comparatively short notice, fares were at what I'd call "summer" levels. Thankfully, UA were offering reasonable priced flights and after a bit of confudilation with the United.bomb, I had an itinerary worked out for the two of us that didn't feel like I was being completely taken down the back alley and asked to to enter my PIN number by two burly men.


Your map. (Powered of course by http://gc.kls2.com/) I'll do some detailed ones later on the trip report - but for now, ORD (Chicago, IL - O'Hare) on the far left, IAD (Washington DC - Dulles) the bottom left marker, PHL (Philadelphia, PA - International) the crossover point in the middle and of course LHR (London, United Kingdom - Heathrow) at the far right. Simples! (You might wish to ask this meerkat about things that are... Simples)

So there it is - no emergency fare, just get there where can and do the support we have to do.

Anyhoo. Forward motion. Lets boogie.

Part I - Off to Kevincm's 3rd favourite airport in the world

Once again, my journey begins the day before. Unlike normal where I have a rucksack that seems to contain a kitchen sink, I've gone with a much more sober looking luggage (dread the thought - almost serious looking)


Be shocked – it’s a suitcase! -My travel trash at work

However At 4:50pm, after kicking a user off the network (a pleasure that Systems Administrators take pride in), I decided I had enough of my work and caught the shuttle bus from work and then onto a train at peak time to High Wycombe – my staging post for the night.

Of course, much Chinese food, red wine, merriment and trying to work out what was being discussed on ensued, before both of us crashing for the night.

All too soon 04:00 rolled round again and by 04:30 it was time to wander to Heathrow.

Heathrow


T1 at 5am in the morning. Fast becoming too much of a regular sight...

After making sure the friend I was travelling had made it to the airport (as we were travelling together), the usual Heathrow organisation (or lack of thereafter) ensued, and by 5:45 we were through security. Then it was a matter of hurdling through WHSmith and making sure we stocked up on ciggies for my friend, it was straight into the Star Alliance lounge for breakfast.


Star Alliance Lounge, Heathrow



Plenty has been written about this good lounge, so of course - I'll write more .

After being welcomed, being allowed to guest my friend and reminded that no boarding calls were made, I made my way in.

Food was it’s usual wonderful self, and a pair of sofas made for a nice comfortable home before heading off.


Breakfast time!

On asking, a WiFi code was given, and the performance of the link was reasonable (not fast, but not exactly a slug - certainly better than my performance than USB 3G Modem).

I noticed that although paper supplies were plentiful, the magazines supplies had dropped considerably (in particular, no Top Gear Magazine - little things like this are noted!) - a sign of the times and cuts (unless some so-and-so nabbed it before me!)



Eventually at 07:00, I could see the flight was being boarded, so we bided goodbye to the lounge

Expecting a hike to the high 50’s, it was a pleasant surprise to be boarding at gate 36 – which for once was not at the back of beyond. Zone 1 had just boarded, so we slipped into the queue and made our way aboard.

Part II – London Heathrow Airport - Chicago O’Hare International
United Airlines UA929, 30/05/09
Boeing 767-300 New International Configuration, Seat 27K - Upsold to E+ ($89)
3953 miles flown, 3942 earned.
Channel 9: Not Enabled

The Pictures


Your map. Powered by http://gc.kls2.com


We were greeted aboard and directly to the back cabin of the 767, and slowly but surely, every seat on the plane filled up – in comparison to the 777, it didn’t feel full even when loaded.


Probably the best thing you'll see on a Y class flight...

The purser made his way around, and after a polite enquiry, Channel 9 was confirmed as off. A minor point, but if you’re feeling horrendously geeky it does kill a good portion of the flight.

The purser then did something quite odd… he wheeled a trolley of newspapers around the plane… … and I managed to nab a copy of Business Traveller before he scooted back to the galley (in an effort to look after the E+ customers). Interesting, and definitely, the first time that happen, so thumbs up there.


At the gate - ready for pushback.

Soon enough, it was pushback, and a trundle around to T5 , turning and then after a VS A340 landed, we took to the skies.


Obligatory A380 photo - QF again.

After taking off, we turned oblique to Heathrow, and climbed to 34,000 feet.


Probably the best way to see LHR... defiantly not IN it

Soon enough, the dreaded breakfast service commenced, with a choice of Waffle or an Omelet. Now knowing how rubbery a UA Omelet could be, I went with the Waffle – What wonders would await me….?


Brekkie.

Well… this is.. umm… Interesting! The fruit was okie (fresh as usual with apple, grape, 1 piece of melon and some orange segments if you dug hard enough). The projectiles was this wonderful mixed brown and white bread that LHR and MANm insist on supplying with meals… the yogurt was passed on, and the waffle – well I’m going be nice here – it wasn’t burnt, it was warm, the mango topping complimented the sweetness quite nicely.

So what about the Bacon. Oh dear. Even I can cook bacon better than this. Extra Rubbery and Extra Crisp sums it up (how they can do that is beyond me...).

Drinks were distributed and after a while, the cabin was cleared down, the lights switched off, and the long schlep over the pond begun.

Of course, there was near enough nothing of interest on provided IFE (except the map), so you know what happens next…


Blue Harvest … of course

The thing is, if you have a friend with an iPod Touch, who is equally dissatisfied with the crap on the IFE… they sorta get you to build a unit for them…


They’re spreading

A couple of water runs were made during the flight – with the flight itself pretty smooth until outskirts of Greenland when it went choppy for a short while, before smoothing out to sheet cloud until well over Canada and almost over US Territory.


Somewhere..
The crew was talking, and most defiantly up for a joke, which made for pleasant interaction. The seats themselves as E+ seats were fine – the legroom wasn’t as spacious as a 777, but still a lot better than down the back of the plane.


Pretty clouds..

About 2 hours before landing, it was time for that wonderful United tradition – the lovely chewable Swiss Cheese and turkey ham roll… which was a chewy as ever. The cost cutting is still in place with KP crisps still, but was acceptable.


It's that chewy roll. BMI Regulars will notice the double finger Twix

Which brings me on to the small matter of coffee. I don’t know how warm it was meant to be, but the term “tepid” seems to fit the description here. Lets just say I could drink a cup in a gulp. Not so good.

Again, the cabin was cleared down, and at that point forms were distributed (1 hour before landing). A bit late IMO as time to fill in the 2 miles of paperwork that the US demands when you enter the country does take time to fill out.



Slowly, the plane begin its decent, as was buffeted as it flew over Lake Michigan, before finally touching down. The plane begun its trundle to the “wonderful” International terminal, where we pulled into gate M12 on schedule.

Overall: Defiantly a reasonable flight - if for the customers service by the Purser. If I was really to pick at something - it's the paperwork issue. For people like me who make enough mistakes on an I-94(W) form, having it delivered early on in the flight would had been far more helpful than leaving it until the last minute. The food was ... interesting, however UA/Alpha/Gate Gourmet ... someone needs to introduce you in how to cook bacon...

Part III - A Chicago Interlude - Back at the Bunny.

After deplaning, it was a short walk to the joy that is US Immigration – which was half closed as only one half of the immigration hall was open.

And I've got to say - it was the quickest entrance into the US that I've had (mentioning certain words seem to make an INS agent whack the passport faster than normal it seems!)

After being stamped into the USA, the belt started spewing out luggage – mine was 6th out (amazingly – the tags worked ) - and my friend’s came out about 5 minutes later.

A quick stroll to Customs, and after rechecking the luggage, we were in the USA. My friend celebrated with 3 cigarettes – I celebrated with a trip to McDonald's to get another diet coke and some fresh air.


Over to T1

After a while, we headed to T1 on the fun ATS, and after going though the joy that is the TSA (with only 3 lanes open…. Clever ) – and managing to split my boarding pass . A quick chat with a Mr Chicken and I had a new one in my grubby mitts. Now that was done, it was off to B18’s Red Carpet Club – the “Incomparable RCC”

Just how incomparable is it though?

United Red Carpet Club (B18)


After descending the escalator into the Incomparable RCC, I smiled, handed over my reprinted boarding card, my friend’s boarding card, and thoroughly confused the RCC member of staff with my BMIBloomington, IL Gold card

Staff member A) “Is BMI a Star Alliance member?”
Me: :Rolleyes:
Staff member B) “BMI British Midland – Yes it’s a member and his card has Star Alliance Gold on it”
Me: Or to be called Lufthansa UK in the future

After a lot more typing were both allowed in.

The lounge itself is very light and airy – certainly better than some of the ones at IAD – but the food options... oh dear. Sunchips, cookies, fruit, cruets and shortbread do NOT maketh food in a lounge (as demonstrated by the Star Alliance Lounge this morning)!


The comfort zone...

However, apart from one TV with CNN blaring out, it was a very quiet and restful lounge, with power plugs at practically every chair - it’s not a bad place to spend time – better than the RCC’s at IAD and certainly a better option that sating in the main terminal

Soon enough 13:45 rolled around, it was time to head to B12 for the next flight.

Part IV Chicago O’Hare International – Philadelphia International Airport

United Airlines UA376, 30/05/09
Airbus A320, Seat 24F - Upsell to $29, Declined.
687 miles flown, 676 earned.
Channel 9 – No

The Pictures

With the Red Carpet lice clear, we boarded the plane and headed down to the back of it. Was greeted aboard, and then made ourselves comfortable. With 2 people on a 3 seater, it was going to be interesting – would we have a middle seat filler or not?

And as the door closed, and mobile phones we told to be switched off (not that the girl in 25F gave any attention to the announcements) the middle seat was left alone.


A UA 777 on the taxiway waiting for us to clear...

A taxi was done, but we were held in the penalty box for 30 minutes to allow some weight calculations completed.


Off we go again!

After that it was a quick turn onto a runway, turning to Chicago, the up to cloud skip and climb to a higher flight level than the previous flight did.


The Windy City in the distance


Cloud Skipping

Eventually a drinks run was done, with a coke going to me – and a cranapple and vodka for my friend (who forgot the same lesson I made in regards to pouring enough vodka to sink a ship – then pour in the cranapple).


Drinks!

I set up an updated version of a ghetto IFE for her iPod Touch, and all was good in the world (I on the other hand actually found something of interest - an episode of 30 Rock)


GettoIFE for iPod touch

However as the last cleanup was completed, it started getting bumpy for the approach to PHL. Crew were ordered to return to seats and for the passengers to self regulate using the “honour” system. It’s nice to see the safety professionals doing the role

Eventually, the turn for PHL was made and we landed, and taxied into the D gates.


Coming in over Philadelphia

Luggage delivery finally after a wait – with no attention paid to priority tags. At this point, I tried to pull the luggage handle… which jammed . And of course – UA baggage denied any responsibility

A few new curse words later out of earshot, and it was off across the bridge and into the murky depths of New Jersey

Overall: Not a bad flight, but post flight support was very poor. Not what I accept from United or any carrier. The "shrug your shoulders and don't fill out any paperwork" quite frankly doesn't wash with me, and really at least some documentation should had been taken.

Part V - Hotel
Red Roof Inn
Somewhere in NJ, off NJ Turnpike (Why can't they say "Toll road"... but I digress)



Yes - it's that "Premium" ()brand, the Red Roof Inn. This one is more of a fancy motel (room opens out onto the car park), but it’s clean and at $65/++ a night, I’ve paid more for less. Overall… like any hotel – if it does the job then so be it.



(and yes - it was piddling it down)

Part VI - One week later - Homeward bound... to PHL

Part VI - One week later - Homeward bound... to PHL

After being stung by a cabbie who refused to take the express routes (thus a $40 became near enough $70), and stuck to local routes from the back end of NJ to PHL, we made it to check-in. In not uncertain terms, no assisted check-in was available, and only Mr Chicken was possible (even in the Elite land)


Elite queues my....

Sigh. Cost cutting.

After a couple last smokes for my friend, we made our way to the wonderful friends that are the TSA. For a Friday, it was very quiet, and the request for manual inspection of film was made without complaint. The only thing that did raise a smile was the “Sharing Caring TSA and here’s a video to prove we are” that was going on – with various excuses for what screening was used and why.

But enough of that. With an early arrival at an airport it was time to play lounges… and again – the RCC was chosen at PHL.

United Red Carpet Club, Terminal D

Whilst not the largest of lounges (least of all the plain looking door at the lounge), we were welcomed and after a bit of key clicking, was invited in, where we sat near the bar.


Empty seats...


The bar

Pretty much immediately, there was a lovely hostess, who offered drinks, snacks and served with an a smile – where nothing was too much (I blame the accents my friend and me have). But it wasn’t just us – she was busying herself, preparing snacks and getting other snacks out.

Whilst not as roomy as the ORD lounge, it is defiantly more intimate, and apart from being in the interconnect corridors as opposed to the D terminal itself, it’s a place I would happily spend a few hours in.

However the clocks rolled around and it was time again to pick up our trash and head to the next fight.


Today's ERJ

A comparatively short walk, and the ERJ was pulling into the gate area – perfect timing. After the previous passengers disembarked and a crew change, we were invited aboard

United Express (Trans-States Airlines)
UA7988 - Philadelphia International - Washington Dulles International Airport
Embraer ERJ-145LR
135 miles flown, 600 earned.
Channel 9: Come on – It’s a regional jet!



It's been some *serious* time since I've been aboard a ERJ-145 (although my "home" airline seems to run them out of LHR with no consideration for the rest of the users), but I'm one of these odd people that actually LIKE this series of ERJ... if for a simple reason - the 1 - 2 seating.

Boarding was completed in zones – and of course bags were too big as usual so some victims had there's gate checked. My bag was pushed under the seat as boarding continued.

I saw my luggage being loaded again – a good sign. Little I was to know what the heck was going to happen next…

Pushback was delayed slightly as the tanker didn’t have enough fuel. Eventually another tanker came around to pump another 500lb of fuel – at which point we were informed due to the short length of flight there would be no drinks service , and soon enough, the standard Republic Airways pre-recorded safety announcement was made.

After a bit of taxiing, it was was quick climb into the air.


Upwards

With such a low cruise altitude of 12,000ft and heavy cloud, it wasn’t the greatest of flights. Parts of it were rollercosteresque, which made for fun.


Grey cloud. That was the view for most of the flight.

But 40 minutes later, we passed the Steven Udvar-Hazy Centre, and shortly thereafter, touched and and after a short taxi, we arrived at the A gates at IAD


Steven Udvar-Hazy Centre - I can recommend the tower.

We disembarked and headed straight into… the rain. Welcome to Washington Dulles....4


Welcome to Dulles...


Part VII - A Dulles Interlude and home

An IAD interlude.

After getting soaked, we entered the bus shelters that are the A gates and after a little comfort break it was off to the fun that is… the Dulles Moonbuggies over to C concourse. Yes, it’s a fun way of getting from concourse to concourse but really… isn’t it time to put these things out to pasture completely and replace them with something modern… (and I’m including the C/D Concourse of IAD in that)

After raiding duty free (again) and the most patriotic shop in West Virginia , it was off to the C7 RCC.


Patriotic!

C7 Red Carpet Lounge

I was greeted with a semi scowl as I fished for my BD*G card, which was presented, and swiped… without drink chits.

Oh dear. Not a wise move. As most of us who use RCC’s know, at a Trans-Oceanic Gateway you get your chits! I then got the line “Only United First/Business” get them… to which the term “Load the rules up was said”.

I was granted my “one time exception” and 3 chits were handed over. Kevincm 1, RCC Dragon, 0

But as soon as I got the drinks from those "wonderfully efficient" bar-people at C7, the gate was called. Rather than waste a drink, both vodkas were drunk in "due time" (i.e. on my schedule not United's),


Sigh. Comfort. For a few minutes at least.

After smiling nicely at the dragon as I left the lounge, the gate lounge had mostly cleared, so it was a matter of handing over the BP and the green bit of card that says I've left the USA, and it was off down the jetway.

United Airlines UA920, 30/05/09
Boeing 767-300 New International Configuration, Seat 27K - Upsold to E+ ($69)
3667 miles flown, 3667 earned.
Channel 9: Not Enabled


The Pictures

As opposed to being welcomed, I made first contact, and then wheeled down the isle to the last row of E+.


Yup. It was still chucking it down.

As the plane was still loading, there was some overhead space available, which was taken advantage of. Pretty soon another full load was ready to travel to London. A short taxi, and it was back up into the cloud.


See you later USA!

However, it did take time but eventually, we punched through the cloud and into the blue sky.


Grey...



Blue!

A drinks service began to be carried out - however, I had my jobs to do...


Yup. It's back. On the PiePhone - Weebl and Bob do "Portal" I'm making note here. "Huge Success" (but is the Cake a lie?)

and after a smile from my friend...


They're both back again

Pretty soon, dinner came around. Chicken or Pasta... with the chicken being chicken curry. How could UA mess this up I wondered? Plenty is the answer!


Dinner. Ooooh Dear.

The rice was soggy AND burnt () the carrots... umm... mush. The Chicken - edible when you could find it. At least the salad was fresh, the projectile was soft and the brownie thing... was something I had a few of at the ORD RCC a few days earlier. I hate to bang on about food - but catering out of the USA has GOT to improve - it's getting unfunny now.

After food was cleared down, the duty free cart came around, and the lights were switched off until breakfast time.


Sunset


2 rounds of water were done, with me leading to a discover on a 767 - the water fountains at the back of the plane... How long have they been hiding there?


The last daylight - the cloud had finally cleared

Eventually, light turned to dark.... and then light came again.


Dawn in the sky - why I pay for a window seat

Breakfast was not served until an hour or so out from LHR- Heathrow... which was.. umm. Yeah. I'll let the picture talk.


A Danish and a Yoghurt.

Oh well... at least the coffee was hot this time as opposed to tepid.

Clear down was done quickly, and the cabin was prepared for landing. After going through the cloud levels, land was visible, with Reading Train station visible, indicating an approach over Windsor -soon enough Windsor Castle was visible.

Shortly the wheels touched down on one of LHR - Heathrow's runways, before a short taxi to the back end of beyond of T1 - Gate 55 (the furthest possible gate from Immigration).


The bird at LHR

Disembarkation occurred quickly, and we arrived at the border. IRIS was of course.. shut, so it was another quick shuffle to immigration - and welcomed back into the United Kingdom.

A slow shuffle down to luggage claim, and already, luggage was having a fun trip around the carousel. My friends turned up. And I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Eventually, I got bored and checked that delivery had been complete - and it dawned on me that my luggage didn't make it.



A quick bit of research indicated it was last scanned in PHL, and therefore it was lost in the maze that was IAD. After checking it wasn't on the next flight, I signed off the customs form and the other pile of paperwork - and I was on my way to the Heathrow Connect, the Bakerloo line to Marylebone and a number 82 to the flat on a wet Saturday Morning.

One day and a half days later, a delivery turned up - and my luggage had finally joined me at home. At least everything made it back.

Eventually.

Epilouge: So with everything over and done with...
There are times when travel is unavoidable - be it for work, love or caring for one another. I certainly have no regrets making this trip. Certainly if I didn't make the trip - I would had regretted it.

However, United Airlines have left a tiny bit of a sour taste in my mouth (and i'm not referring to the curry). Quite frankly, the luggage handling issues are appalling. At least the team in Heathrow said the magic S word. PHL couldn't even handle that.

It's times like this I miss the old BMI Manchester - Chicago flights due to the quality of service on them (which whooped United and co across the pond) - however those days I suspect are gone for now.

In the end, I'll prefer using UA to US. However - I am a bit excited that CO are coming to the party. Hopefully it'll force the rest of its fellow North Americas based Star Alliance members to buck their ideas up and maybe improve their service.

And Flying Pig Airlines might take off first.

And so – to leave you on a picture…



To those who have passed from this world – may any rest you find be peaceful... and may those who look after those who are left behind have the strength to go on to remember those who have gone but to look after those who live in their memories.

----

That's it for this Trip report. No doubt I'll be back in October with another Chicago run (I'm original in my city choice - I have to admit)... but I might have something on the boil in the meantime.

Comments and feedback welcome as normal